OK, I found this post through a link on Annejelynn's blog. The post is actually on Fuzzball's blog and made me laugh so hard I think I wet myself a little. Just check it out, please.
Do you think Indiana Jones ever thinks about this stuff when he's ransacking tombs?
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Oh, What a Night!
Last Friday, I got to go TO the theatre, instead of going and making it! I have to say, it was pretty damn nice.I went to see Jersey Boys at the Ahmanson Theatre in downtown LA. I sucked up my, "Ew, downtown!" issues and hopped in my car.
Fearing the Friday evening traffic would be a nightmare, I ended up being an hour and a half early for an 8pm curtain. What are you gonna do?
Fortunately, I had saved my leftover Subway sandwich from lunch and knew the pavilion outside the theatre would be a nice place to hang out for a while and people watch.
My favorite was the dad in his jeans and blazer with his maybe 7 year old daughter in tow. She was in her little black dress, Angeleno black flip-flops and, hand-in-hand with dad, was ready for a night at the theatre. (Miss you, Daddy!)
I ate my spicy Italian sandwich and drank my vitamin water. (No Coke for me!) I called my mommy and inquired after her recently root-canaled tooth. I lamented over the fact that I couldn't find my damned opera glasses. (Stop laughing.) I admired the fountain and tried to figure out the sculpture atop it. Anybody?
I can tell that you're wondering, "Was she all ALONE?!" And the answer is, "Yes!" My friends showed no interest in seeing Jersey Boys, so I told them they could all go to hell and went all by me onesy, savvy?
I finally wandered inside and found my seat. Sweet mother of Everest! You need oxygen masks up here! Now, I was really pissed that I hadn't found my opera glasses. (I said, stop laughing, you bastards!) Fortunately, they were renting them in the lobby. For $5 and my driver's license, I could see the sequins on their tuxedo lapels. Sweet.
A man and his wife came to sit next to me. As he ogled my boobs, he said I needed to get some new friends. He also insisted on singing along all through the show and, can I just say, he did NOT sound like Frankie Valli!
The show itself was miraculous! The audience loved every second of it and I thought they would spontaneously combust after hearing Christopher Kale Jones (Frankie Valli) sing "Can't Take My Eyes Off You." And I was with them every step of the way. It didn't matter that I wasn't alive in the heyday of the Four Seasons. Two and a half hours flew by and I didn't want it to end.
The best part? Watching those four guys and seeing the joy on their faces. They love doing this show so much. Even after the months and months of doing eight shows a week. Now that's awesome!
I drove home singing "Big Girls Don't Cry" and bouncing in my seat. Too bad they leave after Thursday...
"Vivaldi thought of it first."
"Some guy stole our name?! I'll talk to him!"
-Jersey Boys
Frankly, I'm Stunned!
| HowManyOfMe.com | ||
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That was with the first name Katherine! With the first name "Kati," I get that NO ONE has that name! Does that mean I don't exist?
It also says that more than 99.9% of the people named Kati are female. I'm just wondering about the .01% that are guys... I suppose that weirder stuff has happened.
Thursday, August 23, 2007
Me and SPF
Being that it hasn't rained in Burbank in about eight months now, I've been dwelling on the sun. Both, literally and figuratively. I was thinking about the Irish fair I went to about a year ago. It was blistering hot in Anaheim and we were outside all day, admiring the sheep dogs, drooling over the jewelry, marvelling at the step dancers' wigs, and contemplating buying t-shirts that said, "Feck off."
In anticipation of the heat, I wore a light peasant shirt. Long sleeved to keep the sun off my arms. I smeared myself with SPF 5,000. Face, neck, ears, decollotage, and even my hands.
We got home that night, I took off my shirt and bra, glanced in the mirror, said "Damn!" and went to find Robyn.
I had a line of white cutting through the salmon pink on my back. My bra had protected me, but I had sunburnt THROUGH my damned shirt. THROUGH IT!!!
Robyn confirmed that I was indeed burnt and I grumbled my way into the bathroom to find the aloe vera.
I've now reached a whole new level of paranoia. Apparently, I can only leave the house while wearing lead clothing.
I'm going to go look up rain dances on Google now.
In anticipation of the heat, I wore a light peasant shirt. Long sleeved to keep the sun off my arms. I smeared myself with SPF 5,000. Face, neck, ears, decollotage, and even my hands.
We got home that night, I took off my shirt and bra, glanced in the mirror, said "Damn!" and went to find Robyn.
I had a line of white cutting through the salmon pink on my back. My bra had protected me, but I had sunburnt THROUGH my damned shirt. THROUGH IT!!!
Robyn confirmed that I was indeed burnt and I grumbled my way into the bathroom to find the aloe vera.
I've now reached a whole new level of paranoia. Apparently, I can only leave the house while wearing lead clothing.
I'm going to go look up rain dances on Google now.
Monday, August 20, 2007
A Decade's Worth
Yesterday, the metaphorical curtain came down on my tenth show that I've stage managed. I'm ridiculously pleased with myself over it too.
So, here's a look back at all ten.
1. An Orchesis modern dance concert in college. A landmark because it was the first. They picked me for this one, because I was dancer for so long and claimed to know how their minds work. This is usually true, except for the crazy woman who directed this concert. She called me a dip-shit in a production meeting and was the first director to make me cry. I'm amazed that this was a good enough experience that I agreed to do...
2. Our Country's Good. Also for my stage managing class in college, but not for credit. Their SM fell through and I agreed to do it out of the goodness of my heart. Mum always told me to make my living in life by doing something that I'd be happy to do for free. An excellent play about a convict colony in Australia that decides to put on a play. Irony. I love it. Directed by a slightly more stable woman who only made my cry once, instead of multiple times.
3. The pieces that came before are really only important because they led to this one. What the Butler Saw was my first show in LA and my first show for Banshee. A British farce by Joe Orton about a pychiatrist who's unhappy in his marriage and tries to seduce his new secretary. Through a series of hysterical circumstances, almost the entire cast ends up in their underwear. And note that Sean, the director, didn't make me cry once. Nor has he since.
Favorite quote: "Your actions today would get the Archbishop of Canterbury declared non compos."
"I'm not the Archbishop of Canterbury!"
"No, that will come at a later stage of your illness."
4. The Man from Clare is a beautiful play by John B. Keane. One of the few Irish plays that actually has a happy ending. Aging football player has to face the facts and give way to the young buck who's trying to replace him. Falls in love with local homely girl and enchants her family. One of my favorites. I thought I was OK with this one closing until I got in my car to drive home and sobbed all the way. I look forward to doing another of his plays next spring.
Favorite quote: "Thank God for all things wet!"
5. The Hunt for Red Willie was an interesting experience. It didn't bring in the crowds that we needed/wanted it to. Also a farce about poitin makers (that's Irish moonshine, by the way) running about the countryside and a mask with a bizarre influence over those who wear it. We were all glad to see this one close. And yet, we still talk to audience members who say it was their favorite.
6. Mine Eyes Hath Seen has been my favorite out of all the shows I've done. A compilation of journal entries and letters from the Civil War. Amazing because of all the people who came out afterwards saying, "I had no idea!" Gives you a whole new perspective on the people who fought, why they fought, and how they survived (or didn't) during the war. I was very sad to see this one go and started crying even before curtain call started.
Favorite quote: "... gladly would I wash out with my tears, every little stain upon your happiness."
*There was another show that I started to stage manage in this gap, but it was such a hellish experience that I prefer to just ignore the fact that it happened at all. It involved a sociopath director, sobbing, big-ass snakes, too much caffeine, more sobbing, a blatant diregard for equity rules, a ladder, me falling off said ladder, a chiropractor, even more sobbing, a call to my aunt in North Carolina, a resignation 2 days before we opened, a number of hideous reviews, and much rejoicing at being back in the arms of Banshee. I'll leave it at that.*
7. Eclipsed was an intense play about the unwed mothers in the Magdalene laundries in Ireland. The story of a few of them and how they came to be where they are. And their fondness for Elvis. Remember what I said about Irish plays and happy endings...? There was a lot of drinking during this one.
Favorite quote: "The keys, sister! Give us the keys!"
8. Next came Dockers by Martin Lynch. A tale of dock workers in Northern Ireland and their fight against a corrupt union. Ditto about the happy ending. This one was a milestone because it was the first show in our own theatre.
Favorite quote: "Whatever you like now, Sarah. It's all the same to me."
9. Another milestone! First Shakespeare. Henry IV, Part 1 was a pile of fun and very daunting with a cast of 18 and a broadsword battle with 16! And on a stage that's the size of a postage stamp.
Favorite quote: "Jack, how agrees the devil and thee about thy soul that thou soldest him on Good Friday last for a cup of madeira and a cold capon's leg?"
And, last but not least...
10. Power by Nick Dear. Louis XIV and all that jazz. Nicholas Fouquet and his machinations. Building Versailles, imprisonment, adultery, fashion, more adultery, and of course apricots. McKerrin was a great director and, also, didn't make me cry. To think that I was going to take a break for this show... Pssh! I'm OK with this one ending because I really need to clean my apartment and go to the grocery store.
Favorite quote: "As for the clergy, they will suffer for their idiotic celibacy."
(Why is it that now while I write this, I can't remember the best quotes...? Maybe I'll have to go back and check my scripts for better ones.)
What comes next, you ask? If I tell you now, then I won't have anything to blog about in the next months. You'll have to keep reading... Just know that it took coercion, bribery, and much cajoling to talk me into the next one. It's a real upper! Ooh, you can feel the sarcasm oozing through the screen, can't you? My loins are girded, so to speak. And not in a fun way.
God, I love live theatre!
So, here's a look back at all ten.
1. An Orchesis modern dance concert in college. A landmark because it was the first. They picked me for this one, because I was dancer for so long and claimed to know how their minds work. This is usually true, except for the crazy woman who directed this concert. She called me a dip-shit in a production meeting and was the first director to make me cry. I'm amazed that this was a good enough experience that I agreed to do...
2. Our Country's Good. Also for my stage managing class in college, but not for credit. Their SM fell through and I agreed to do it out of the goodness of my heart. Mum always told me to make my living in life by doing something that I'd be happy to do for free. An excellent play about a convict colony in Australia that decides to put on a play. Irony. I love it. Directed by a slightly more stable woman who only made my cry once, instead of multiple times.
3. The pieces that came before are really only important because they led to this one. What the Butler Saw was my first show in LA and my first show for Banshee. A British farce by Joe Orton about a pychiatrist who's unhappy in his marriage and tries to seduce his new secretary. Through a series of hysterical circumstances, almost the entire cast ends up in their underwear. And note that Sean, the director, didn't make me cry once. Nor has he since.
Favorite quote: "Your actions today would get the Archbishop of Canterbury declared non compos."
"I'm not the Archbishop of Canterbury!"
"No, that will come at a later stage of your illness."
4. The Man from Clare is a beautiful play by John B. Keane. One of the few Irish plays that actually has a happy ending. Aging football player has to face the facts and give way to the young buck who's trying to replace him. Falls in love with local homely girl and enchants her family. One of my favorites. I thought I was OK with this one closing until I got in my car to drive home and sobbed all the way. I look forward to doing another of his plays next spring.
Favorite quote: "Thank God for all things wet!"
5. The Hunt for Red Willie was an interesting experience. It didn't bring in the crowds that we needed/wanted it to. Also a farce about poitin makers (that's Irish moonshine, by the way) running about the countryside and a mask with a bizarre influence over those who wear it. We were all glad to see this one close. And yet, we still talk to audience members who say it was their favorite.
6. Mine Eyes Hath Seen has been my favorite out of all the shows I've done. A compilation of journal entries and letters from the Civil War. Amazing because of all the people who came out afterwards saying, "I had no idea!" Gives you a whole new perspective on the people who fought, why they fought, and how they survived (or didn't) during the war. I was very sad to see this one go and started crying even before curtain call started.
Favorite quote: "... gladly would I wash out with my tears, every little stain upon your happiness."
*There was another show that I started to stage manage in this gap, but it was such a hellish experience that I prefer to just ignore the fact that it happened at all. It involved a sociopath director, sobbing, big-ass snakes, too much caffeine, more sobbing, a blatant diregard for equity rules, a ladder, me falling off said ladder, a chiropractor, even more sobbing, a call to my aunt in North Carolina, a resignation 2 days before we opened, a number of hideous reviews, and much rejoicing at being back in the arms of Banshee. I'll leave it at that.*
7. Eclipsed was an intense play about the unwed mothers in the Magdalene laundries in Ireland. The story of a few of them and how they came to be where they are. And their fondness for Elvis. Remember what I said about Irish plays and happy endings...? There was a lot of drinking during this one.
Favorite quote: "The keys, sister! Give us the keys!"
8. Next came Dockers by Martin Lynch. A tale of dock workers in Northern Ireland and their fight against a corrupt union. Ditto about the happy ending. This one was a milestone because it was the first show in our own theatre.
Favorite quote: "Whatever you like now, Sarah. It's all the same to me."
9. Another milestone! First Shakespeare. Henry IV, Part 1 was a pile of fun and very daunting with a cast of 18 and a broadsword battle with 16! And on a stage that's the size of a postage stamp.
Favorite quote: "Jack, how agrees the devil and thee about thy soul that thou soldest him on Good Friday last for a cup of madeira and a cold capon's leg?"
And, last but not least...
10. Power by Nick Dear. Louis XIV and all that jazz. Nicholas Fouquet and his machinations. Building Versailles, imprisonment, adultery, fashion, more adultery, and of course apricots. McKerrin was a great director and, also, didn't make me cry. To think that I was going to take a break for this show... Pssh! I'm OK with this one ending because I really need to clean my apartment and go to the grocery store.
Favorite quote: "As for the clergy, they will suffer for their idiotic celibacy."
(Why is it that now while I write this, I can't remember the best quotes...? Maybe I'll have to go back and check my scripts for better ones.)
What comes next, you ask? If I tell you now, then I won't have anything to blog about in the next months. You'll have to keep reading... Just know that it took coercion, bribery, and much cajoling to talk me into the next one. It's a real upper! Ooh, you can feel the sarcasm oozing through the screen, can't you? My loins are girded, so to speak. And not in a fun way.
God, I love live theatre!
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