I Hear They Taste Just Like Chicken

Robyn told me a story, once, about a TV show she saw. It was a series of skits and most of them were bad, but one... One was about a couple who were having dinner. Both were looking bored with the bland meat they were having. The woman said something about how tired of her cooking she was. And the man said,

"Have you ever had muppet?"

At this point in the story, I was laughing pretty hard. First of all, muppet is a funny word! Not weasel funny, but funny. And it got better...

The woman says, "No! How do you catch a muppet?"
He replies, loudly, "You know, I can't seem to remember the difference. Which is near and which is far?"

A little, cute muppet pops up in front of him and says, "Near!"

He jumps on it and we cut to... A tasty dinner. They're thoroughly enjoying their juicy meal, when they hear a pounding from the door. It smashes open to reveal a Sweetums-size muppet who roars, "Far!"

It lasted me at least three days. And in that tone... if I were a muppet, I would be --

You Are Animal

A complete lunatic, you're operating on 100% animal instincts. You thrive on uncontrolled energy, and you're downright scary. But you sure can beat a good drum. "Kill! Kill!"

The Muppet Personality Test